http://whyshesstillsingle.blogspot.com/2009/06/perfect-one-always-goes.html
That being said, HINT #18: Be yourself; don't try to be perfect. A woman worth your time doesn't desire a marionnette. Synonyms for marionette are: puppet, doll, dummy. And if the woman you're interested in doesn't reciprocate unless you're her puppet, drop her.
What is perfection anyway? In my opinion, perfection is consistently striving to better yourself and to be a positive example and influence to those around you. The easiest way to do that is to listen for and obey the revelation/inspiration you receive. In short, become and be what Heavenly Father wants you to be. Trust in Him!
Friday, June 26, 2009
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Manners and the Good Ole South!!
The other day as I was leaving the Wilk an older gentleman copiously held the door open for me saying, “My mother’s watching.” and he looked up with a shine in his eye. The sweetness of his sentiment made my eyes smart, too. His mother taught him well. He learned to love, cherish, respect, and serve women from his mother and he still wanted to please her. (Alma 56:48) HINT #11: If your mother wouldn’t approve of your actions if she were watching you, change your actions.
At this point, I feel that a confession on my part is owed to you, my readers. I’m just like every other girl here at BYU. I have watched every version of Pride and Prejudice that I’m aware of. I have seen and loved Gone With the Wind. My apartment has at least one copy of the following: A Walk to Remember, Pride and Prejudice (6 hour version), P&P (Kiera Knightly), P&P (Mormon AKA Pink Bible), P&P (Bollywood), various other “period dramas”, The Princess Bride, and approximately 90% or more of the movies we have are chick flicks. In fact, the only way that I might be different from other girls is that I’ve read the original books or plays that our movies are based on- all of them. I’ve read the entire Austen anthology, I’ve read Gone With the Wind and all of the sequels (authorized and not), and I’ve read all of the Twilight Series. In a matter of days.
About Twilight, I enjoyed the story. Meyers is a good story teller. She’s horrid at grammar, sentence structure, and non-redundant word choice. But, that’s why her work is my guilty pleasure, my brain candy. HINT #12: I know you hate the idea, but put up with the phenomenon. We love it; we eat that BS up. It’s because it’s a completely unrealistic love story about a guy and girl who are completely devoted to each other. The fact that Edward is intelligent, an accomplished pianist, holds multiple degrees in medicine (see Midnight Sun), knows Bella better than she knows herself, knows her faults and loves her strengths, and is willing to do anything for her while still maintaining his own moral code only adds to the warm fuzzies we love to get. Here’s a worthwhile guy! She wants to sleep with him and he won’t do it until they’re married. (He’s a bit too perfect-seeming, and thereby boring, for my personal taste but that’s another story.)
HINT #13: It’s the silly, sentimental things you do that get you the serious brownie points. Case in point, I was having a horrible week. Life was busy with papers, projects, finals quickly approaching, and on top of that I got sick. A choice son of God whom I don’t like was over and offended me. My good friend that I’ll call N was a god-send. N. was able to see that my feelings were hurt and he could tell that I was having a horrible day. He was supportive, kind, gave me a hug, and made me laugh. He did this out of the kindness of his heart and it wasn’t a big deal to him. The unexpected perk for his kindness is that every single girl that we know in common was told the glowing tale. I told any girl that would listen what a great guy N is and how he was my hero for the day/week. I had everyone one of them oohing and ahhing over how wonderful N is. Guys, do you hear that publicity? Every one of those girls is looking at N more favorably than ever, including his ex-girlfriend! HINT #14: Nothing will get you farther faster than the free publicity of a grateful female discussing your good deed with her friends. And she will tell all of them; it’s just how we are.
I have another confession. I am a girl who worships at the shrine of Southern manners and good ol’ gentlemen. I didn’t realize until recently just how much I missed the manners back home. (I was blessed to be born and raised South of the Mason-Dixon line.) There are some doors at my high school that I didn’t open for myself until me senior year; up until that point, the guys would always get the door for me. HINT # 15: No matter who the female is, hold the door for her. If she isn’t connected to you at all, it’s bonus points. We women are suckers for polite gentlemen.
Along the same lines as the last few hints, here’s a big one. HINT # 16: Treat all women with the same amount of respect as you would want your mother or wife to be treated with. There may be no direct benefit to you right now other than practice and becoming a better man, but it might just catch that hot-seemingly-out-of-your-league bombshell’s attention. Not that you should be polite because of a hope for reward, but…I’m just saying, manners are eye-catching.
There’s more to manners than just holding a door. Manners are about noticing others and anticipating their needs. Polite people pay attention to others. Men who are effortlessly polite to everyone are widely admired and greatly sought after. HINT #17: Compassion, kindness, generosity, and empathy will get you farther than a Visa card with no limit.
http://www.ehow.com/how_2324670_have-good-southern-manners.html
http://www.knowsouthernhistory.net/Culture/Manners/table_of_contents.htm
http://www.victorianstation.com/ettiqgentle.htm
So, thank you kindly for reading and have a great day all ya’ll! I’ll be right back after finals!
At this point, I feel that a confession on my part is owed to you, my readers. I’m just like every other girl here at BYU. I have watched every version of Pride and Prejudice that I’m aware of. I have seen and loved Gone With the Wind. My apartment has at least one copy of the following: A Walk to Remember, Pride and Prejudice (6 hour version), P&P (Kiera Knightly), P&P (Mormon AKA Pink Bible), P&P (Bollywood), various other “period dramas”, The Princess Bride, and approximately 90% or more of the movies we have are chick flicks. In fact, the only way that I might be different from other girls is that I’ve read the original books or plays that our movies are based on- all of them. I’ve read the entire Austen anthology, I’ve read Gone With the Wind and all of the sequels (authorized and not), and I’ve read all of the Twilight Series. In a matter of days.
About Twilight, I enjoyed the story. Meyers is a good story teller. She’s horrid at grammar, sentence structure, and non-redundant word choice. But, that’s why her work is my guilty pleasure, my brain candy. HINT #12: I know you hate the idea, but put up with the phenomenon. We love it; we eat that BS up. It’s because it’s a completely unrealistic love story about a guy and girl who are completely devoted to each other. The fact that Edward is intelligent, an accomplished pianist, holds multiple degrees in medicine (see Midnight Sun), knows Bella better than she knows herself, knows her faults and loves her strengths, and is willing to do anything for her while still maintaining his own moral code only adds to the warm fuzzies we love to get. Here’s a worthwhile guy! She wants to sleep with him and he won’t do it until they’re married. (He’s a bit too perfect-seeming, and thereby boring, for my personal taste but that’s another story.)
HINT #13: It’s the silly, sentimental things you do that get you the serious brownie points. Case in point, I was having a horrible week. Life was busy with papers, projects, finals quickly approaching, and on top of that I got sick. A choice son of God whom I don’t like was over and offended me. My good friend that I’ll call N was a god-send. N. was able to see that my feelings were hurt and he could tell that I was having a horrible day. He was supportive, kind, gave me a hug, and made me laugh. He did this out of the kindness of his heart and it wasn’t a big deal to him. The unexpected perk for his kindness is that every single girl that we know in common was told the glowing tale. I told any girl that would listen what a great guy N is and how he was my hero for the day/week. I had everyone one of them oohing and ahhing over how wonderful N is. Guys, do you hear that publicity? Every one of those girls is looking at N more favorably than ever, including his ex-girlfriend! HINT #14: Nothing will get you farther faster than the free publicity of a grateful female discussing your good deed with her friends. And she will tell all of them; it’s just how we are.
I have another confession. I am a girl who worships at the shrine of Southern manners and good ol’ gentlemen. I didn’t realize until recently just how much I missed the manners back home. (I was blessed to be born and raised South of the Mason-Dixon line.) There are some doors at my high school that I didn’t open for myself until me senior year; up until that point, the guys would always get the door for me. HINT # 15: No matter who the female is, hold the door for her. If she isn’t connected to you at all, it’s bonus points. We women are suckers for polite gentlemen.
Along the same lines as the last few hints, here’s a big one. HINT # 16: Treat all women with the same amount of respect as you would want your mother or wife to be treated with. There may be no direct benefit to you right now other than practice and becoming a better man, but it might just catch that hot-seemingly-out-of-your-league bombshell’s attention. Not that you should be polite because of a hope for reward, but…I’m just saying, manners are eye-catching.
There’s more to manners than just holding a door. Manners are about noticing others and anticipating their needs. Polite people pay attention to others. Men who are effortlessly polite to everyone are widely admired and greatly sought after. HINT #17: Compassion, kindness, generosity, and empathy will get you farther than a Visa card with no limit.
http://www.ehow.com/how_2324670_have-good-southern-manners.html
http://www.knowsouthernhistory.net/Culture/Manners/table_of_contents.htm
http://www.victorianstation.com/ettiqgentle.htm
So, thank you kindly for reading and have a great day all ya’ll! I’ll be right back after finals!
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Emotional Expression, Accessibility, and Crying
Southern women have a saying that I love. It is "I am indisposed." It's a polite way of informing other(s) that you are not available. It can be used because you have a face and hair mask on, because you're in the bathroom, because you don't like the person(s) in question, or because you have decided to be unavailable for whatever reason or non reason you feel like. My favorite use is the last.
Why do we feel that we have to be accessible at every moment of every day? Yes I have a cell phone with texting capabilities, a facebook account, a (okay, several) blogs, and multiple email addresses. Yet, this doesn't mean that I want to be accessible incessantly. Sometimes I'd like the cut the internet off (sorry roommates and girls who high-jack my wireless because you won't buy your own router...) I love the internet; I'm using it right now to listen to music and type this blog. But, I want to be invisible and inaccessible sometimes, like today.
In Beyonce's song "If I Were A Boy," she addresses the accessibility differences between the genders saying, "If I were a boy I would turn off my phone, tell everyone it's broken... I'd put myself first and make the rules as I go." How many guys are able to actually put themselves first and how few women get to? When is it okay for women to take off on their own, doing their own thing, and not telling anyone or feeling as if you must ask permission from someone? Why are women thought to be mentally unstable when they take a "mental health day" but men are assumed to have just wanted a break?
Why do women feel the compulsion to always be "there" for someone. I don't want to always be there; I'm tired of being the rock. I'd like to be the one needing others sometimes AND I'd like to feel like that's acceptable, not that I'm letting someone down by wanting to talk about myself or what's on my mind. I want others to be more accepting of a normal range of emotion. Guess what? Women get angry. We get hurt. We get irrational. We sometimes cry for no apparent reason (i.e. we might not be able to pin it down, but there's something causing it.) HINT: #8: A woman is never crying for no reason. Treat her as if she is at your own peril.
Word to the wise, (HINT #9) if a woman leaves crying, follow her. Even if she really, truly did just want to be alone, you'll get more points than you lose by following.
Why are women expected to be happy, bubbly, cheerful creatures always in the background. Seriously?!?!(said in my most Grey's-esque manner I can achieve) Seriously, what planet do you live on? Why should women be expected to be perfect when men aren't?
On that note, what's with the popular trend in the media's display of gender roles. Why are more and more of the leading men in romantic comedies the funny fat guy who's a neanderthal or else the femme/confused about his gender guy that we're calling "male"? The trend in female leads are nubile sex symbols/cougars who are perfectly capable of balancing careers, family, friends, living a crazy single life style, and still keeping it all together. The alternative is the woman who has it all, but is spinning out of control until a knight in shining armor appears on his figurative white horse. Worse than this is the helpless male in distress. As much as I hate seeing damsels in distress, it's sickening to see the gender roles reversed and "men" acting like women. HINT #10: Pardon the crudeness (because once again women aren't supposed to be crude), grow a pair.
Perhaps I'll write more about crying in the future since it seems to baffle most men.
Why do we feel that we have to be accessible at every moment of every day? Yes I have a cell phone with texting capabilities, a facebook account, a (okay, several) blogs, and multiple email addresses. Yet, this doesn't mean that I want to be accessible incessantly. Sometimes I'd like the cut the internet off (sorry roommates and girls who high-jack my wireless because you won't buy your own router...) I love the internet; I'm using it right now to listen to music and type this blog. But, I want to be invisible and inaccessible sometimes, like today.
In Beyonce's song "If I Were A Boy," she addresses the accessibility differences between the genders saying, "If I were a boy I would turn off my phone, tell everyone it's broken... I'd put myself first and make the rules as I go." How many guys are able to actually put themselves first and how few women get to? When is it okay for women to take off on their own, doing their own thing, and not telling anyone or feeling as if you must ask permission from someone? Why are women thought to be mentally unstable when they take a "mental health day" but men are assumed to have just wanted a break?
Why do women feel the compulsion to always be "there" for someone. I don't want to always be there; I'm tired of being the rock. I'd like to be the one needing others sometimes AND I'd like to feel like that's acceptable, not that I'm letting someone down by wanting to talk about myself or what's on my mind. I want others to be more accepting of a normal range of emotion. Guess what? Women get angry. We get hurt. We get irrational. We sometimes cry for no apparent reason (i.e. we might not be able to pin it down, but there's something causing it.) HINT: #8: A woman is never crying for no reason. Treat her as if she is at your own peril.
Word to the wise, (HINT #9) if a woman leaves crying, follow her. Even if she really, truly did just want to be alone, you'll get more points than you lose by following.
Why are women expected to be happy, bubbly, cheerful creatures always in the background. Seriously?!?!(said in my most Grey's-esque manner I can achieve) Seriously, what planet do you live on? Why should women be expected to be perfect when men aren't?
On that note, what's with the popular trend in the media's display of gender roles. Why are more and more of the leading men in romantic comedies the funny fat guy who's a neanderthal or else the femme/confused about his gender guy that we're calling "male"? The trend in female leads are nubile sex symbols/cougars who are perfectly capable of balancing careers, family, friends, living a crazy single life style, and still keeping it all together. The alternative is the woman who has it all, but is spinning out of control until a knight in shining armor appears on his figurative white horse. Worse than this is the helpless male in distress. As much as I hate seeing damsels in distress, it's sickening to see the gender roles reversed and "men" acting like women. HINT #10: Pardon the crudeness (because once again women aren't supposed to be crude), grow a pair.
Perhaps I'll write more about crying in the future since it seems to baffle most men.
Thursday, March 26, 2009
A-Dressing a Few Fundamentals
2 Corinthians 6:14 “Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?”
What man wants to marry down? None that’s worth having. (Those lacking confidence need not apply.) FYI guys, no woman really wants to marry down either despite popular commentary to the opposite effect. For example: “I married beneath me -- all women do.”~Lady Nancy Astor.
I don’t know about you, but as a BYU student, I have had the opportunity to know many, many amazing women (and some that made me want to ram my head into a wall) and some fabulous men. But, unfortunately, the number of impressive women and the number of impeccable men have not been equal. In my opinion, brethren, you’re getting quite the lucky break!
I know that President Hinckley is infinitely more qualified (and dead on…) than I am to discuss this (or pretty much any) topic, so I’m going to quote his talk “Rise Up, O Men of God” from the Ensign in November of 2006. The title is taken from a song that he quotes and gives history on if you’re interested. The lyrics are really cool.
“Awake, my sons; put on the armor of righteousness. Shake off the chains with which ye are bound, and come forth out of obscurity, and arise from the dust” (2 Nephi 1:23). Really guys, don’t be afraid to stand out. HINT #1: Women like confidence. We crave it. It’s unbelievably hot- even if you were beaten by the ugly tree on the way up and down- if you’re confident enough, we might not notice. Wear it like cologne. Oh yeah, cologne is really good; just not too much of it. HINT #2: Try spraying one (yes only one) spray on your chest near/right under where the knot of your tie is/would be. When we hug you, our faces will be right there; it’s a nice place to be. The goal of cologne is for it to be faint and to mingle with your scent. If I have to get close to smell it, oh darn! It’s a great excuse that I want to take advantage of. Give me that opportunity; it's a win-win situation!
“Some of you young men seem to delight in dressing in a slouchy manner. I know that it is a sensitive subject, but I believe it is unbecoming to young men who have been ordained to the holy priesthood of God.” Okay guys, I’m not saying that you have to wear suits all of the time by any means, but dress your age. Hoodies and jeans are do-able, but they’re not head-turners. HINT #3: A sure-fire hot outfit: dark brown shoes, dark/stone wash jeans, and a white crewneck T-shirt or button-down shirt. Hot. So hot. It’s classic, it’s masculine. The colors work on anyone.
HINTS #4 & 5: When it comes to dressing up nicely, a two-piece suit will pretty much always beat out a pair of slacks and a shirt. A three-piece suit is infinitely better than a two-piece. Why is this? I’m not sure; it could be a throw back to classier times. But my hunch is that it’s straight-up sex appeal with no other thought behind the opinion. HINT #6: Make sure your socks match your pants; you’ll look taller (this is a desirable thing even if we don’t like admitting it). Match your socks to your shoes in a pinch. Deacons wear white gym socks, not men.
“Women have earned more bachelor’s degrees than men every year since 1982 and more master’s degrees since 1986. ...And so I say to you young men, rise up and discipline yourself to take advantage of educational opportunities. Do you wish to marry a girl whose education has been far superior to your own? We speak of being 'equally yoked.' That applies, I think, to the matter of education.” Intelligent women are intimidating, we realize this. HINT #7: Go to college, get an education, and give us a run for our money. If we’re worth our salt, we’ll enjoy the competition and benefit from it as much as you do.
This is long enough for a maiden voyage. Happy hunting! Oh, HINT #8: do the hunting. We enjoy being chased.
What man wants to marry down? None that’s worth having. (Those lacking confidence need not apply.) FYI guys, no woman really wants to marry down either despite popular commentary to the opposite effect. For example: “I married beneath me -- all women do.”~Lady Nancy Astor.
I don’t know about you, but as a BYU student, I have had the opportunity to know many, many amazing women (and some that made me want to ram my head into a wall) and some fabulous men. But, unfortunately, the number of impressive women and the number of impeccable men have not been equal. In my opinion, brethren, you’re getting quite the lucky break!
I know that President Hinckley is infinitely more qualified (and dead on…) than I am to discuss this (or pretty much any) topic, so I’m going to quote his talk “Rise Up, O Men of God” from the Ensign in November of 2006. The title is taken from a song that he quotes and gives history on if you’re interested. The lyrics are really cool.
“Awake, my sons; put on the armor of righteousness. Shake off the chains with which ye are bound, and come forth out of obscurity, and arise from the dust” (2 Nephi 1:23). Really guys, don’t be afraid to stand out. HINT #1: Women like confidence. We crave it. It’s unbelievably hot- even if you were beaten by the ugly tree on the way up and down- if you’re confident enough, we might not notice. Wear it like cologne. Oh yeah, cologne is really good; just not too much of it. HINT #2: Try spraying one (yes only one) spray on your chest near/right under where the knot of your tie is/would be. When we hug you, our faces will be right there; it’s a nice place to be. The goal of cologne is for it to be faint and to mingle with your scent. If I have to get close to smell it, oh darn! It’s a great excuse that I want to take advantage of. Give me that opportunity; it's a win-win situation!
“Some of you young men seem to delight in dressing in a slouchy manner. I know that it is a sensitive subject, but I believe it is unbecoming to young men who have been ordained to the holy priesthood of God.” Okay guys, I’m not saying that you have to wear suits all of the time by any means, but dress your age. Hoodies and jeans are do-able, but they’re not head-turners. HINT #3: A sure-fire hot outfit: dark brown shoes, dark/stone wash jeans, and a white crewneck T-shirt or button-down shirt. Hot. So hot. It’s classic, it’s masculine. The colors work on anyone.
HINTS #4 & 5: When it comes to dressing up nicely, a two-piece suit will pretty much always beat out a pair of slacks and a shirt. A three-piece suit is infinitely better than a two-piece. Why is this? I’m not sure; it could be a throw back to classier times. But my hunch is that it’s straight-up sex appeal with no other thought behind the opinion. HINT #6: Make sure your socks match your pants; you’ll look taller (this is a desirable thing even if we don’t like admitting it). Match your socks to your shoes in a pinch. Deacons wear white gym socks, not men.
“Women have earned more bachelor’s degrees than men every year since 1982 and more master’s degrees since 1986. ...And so I say to you young men, rise up and discipline yourself to take advantage of educational opportunities. Do you wish to marry a girl whose education has been far superior to your own? We speak of being 'equally yoked.' That applies, I think, to the matter of education.” Intelligent women are intimidating, we realize this. HINT #7: Go to college, get an education, and give us a run for our money. If we’re worth our salt, we’ll enjoy the competition and benefit from it as much as you do.
This is long enough for a maiden voyage. Happy hunting! Oh, HINT #8: do the hunting. We enjoy being chased.
Thursday, March 12, 2009
At The Beginning
The idea for this blog came from a challenge http://www.whymormongirlsstaysingle.com/ I really enjoy reading this blog, but I naturally have my own opinions and ideas that I want to share.
The challenge is specifically located here, #17: http://www.whymormongirlsstaysingle.com/2009/02/im-still-on-vacation-xoxo.html
No, one post doesn't count because this is #1. :)
Happy Hunting Heroes!
The challenge is specifically located here, #17: http://www.whymormongirlsstaysingle.com/2009/02/im-still-on-vacation-xoxo.html
No, one post doesn't count because this is #1. :)
Happy Hunting Heroes!
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